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UPDATE: Saturday, June 12, 2010      The Japan Times Weekly    2003年6月7日号 (バックナンバー)
 
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SLEEPLESS IN SETAGAYA

Quaking all over

By ROBERT HALLAM

* This essay column is written by a longtime foreign resident of Japan.

I'd gone to bed just after 9 p.m. and set the alarm for 12:15 a.m. intending to get up to watch an Italian league soccer game. It was to be the highlight of my weekend -- that gives you some idea just how miserable most of my weekends are. The alarm went off as planned and I turned it off and went back to sleep. What would any other sensible human being have done at that time of morning?

But less than 45 minutes later the earth moved and I was wide awake; out of bed, up and running -- for my life.

Forget double-bell alarms, repeat buzzers, flashing lights, crowing cockerels or Ultraman figures shouting "Okite! Okite!" There's really nothing like an earthquake to get you out of bed. Perhaps Sekisui House or Misawa Homes could develop a device and build it into their houses that would shake the structure and the occupiers out of bed at any time they wanted. You'd just have to punch in a few numbers and set the time you wanted to quake (sorry!) up.

The earthquake that rattled me awake at 12:57 a.m. measured 5.1 on the Richter scale, according to news reports. But what does that mean? How does that compare to a 5.0 or a 5.2 quake? The Richter scale's figures are so impersonal, and if nothing else, earthquakes are very personal experiences. That's why I prefer the Japanese scale that describes what some average Joe (or Suzuki) is feeling and what is happening around him during earthquakes of 10 levels of intensity.

I can relate much more to such descriptions as "some are frightened," "most are very frightened," "many weak buildings collapse" or "furniture flies about" than to 5.0, 5.2, 5.7, which sound more like the scores the Latvian judge might give U.S. ice skaters.

But how do they arrive at these "average" effects?

I can understand piling some furniture or some scale model buildings in an earthquake simulator and giving them a good shaking to produce the physical effects, but what about the emotional effects? Do they dump poor old Joe in the simulator without a table to hide under and gradually crank up the intensity until his screams drown out its rattle?

And why is there no mention of fear after the Upper 5 level of intensity? Has poor Joe passed out or is he lying unconscious under the pile of furniture?

Perhaps it's all become too much for Joe and from Lower 6 upward he begins to lose control and, of course, the government wouldn't want to include in its official descriptions of the effects on humans whimpering, wailing and gnashing of teeth, or soiled underwear.

Perhaps I should ask Tokyo Gov. Shintaro Ishihara at what level we foreigners are supposed to climb out from the rubble of our destroyed homes and riot in the streets?

I ask because I obviously want to behave appropriately and fit in -- including doing my bit in the rioting.

I think I've got the fear reaction pretty much down pat. I feel every little shift of every little tectonic plate under Japan, including the zeros on the Japanese scale. I'm thinking of petitioning the government to amend its intensity scale so that the zero rating is for earthquakes "not felt by people, apart from the human seismograph in Setagaya."

A truck rumbles by, the house shudders as it expands or contracts and settles down for the night after the day's heat or cold, or my heart skips a beat unleashing an internal tremor and I head for my sanctuary.

Fortunately, my wife and son sleep through the temblors, oblivious to the impending doom, so I don't have to explain to them that I have been walking in my sleep and yet again found myself under the living room table!

I'd welcome any comments or opinions, in Japanese or English, about my column. You can write or fax me at The Weekly, or e-mail me at jtweekly@japantimes.co.jp

The Japan Times Weekly: June 7, 2003
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