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Saturday, July 6, 2002

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Goldirocks' Japan home stay experience


Have you ever wondered what would happen if Goldilocks came to Japan?

Three Japanese bears lived in a bamboo forest in Nagano Prefecture. One day, after Mama bear made breakfast, she suggested they all go to the park for "radio taiso" exercises. So Mama bear, Papa bear and their son, Taro-bear, left the house.

At that time, a tourist named Goldilocks was walking through the forest. She had lost her way. The door of the bears' house was open, so she went inside.

In the kitchen, she saw breakfast sitting on the table. "I'm so hungry," said Goldilocks.

She picked up the chopsticks and dipped the ends into the first bowl of miso soup and tasted it. "This soup is too salty!" she said.

She dipped the chopsticks into the second bowl of soup. "This soup is good but it's impossible to eat with chopsticks!"

She said. She looked over at the last, and largest breakfast. "This Starbucks caffe Verona with croissant are just right!" she said -- and ate the whole thing.

Goldilocks looked around the room for a Lazy-Boy chair to sit on. But there were no chairs.

"A house with no chairs?" she said. "How strange!" She saw some cushions on the floor. She sat on the first one, which was made of straw. "This cushion is not comfortable at all!" she said.

She sat on the second cushion. It was made of cotton and had "Hello Kitty" on it. "This cushion is good but there is no back support," she said. Then she noticed something sitting on the floor that looked like a chair with no legs. She sat on it and leaned back. "This pseudo-chair is just right!" She said. But just then, the aluminum frame creaked and broke.

Goldilocks was feeling a little tired so she looked for a place to lie down. She found a room with two futons in it. "No beds?" she said. "How strange!" She tried the first futon but her feet stuck out the end. "This futon is too short," she said. She tried the second futon. "This futon has a pillow as hard as uncooked rice." She opened the shoji door leading to the next room. She saw a large bed and lay down on it. "This bed and pillow are just right!"

The bears returned from their stretching exercises and sat down to breakfast. "Someone has been eating my miso soup!" said Papa bear, noticing the dirty chopsticks. "Someone's been eating mine too," said Mama bear, her chopsticks speared with small pieces of tofu. "My Starbuck's caffe Verona and croissant are gone!" exclaimed Taro-bear.

They went into the living room. "Someone's been sitting on my cushion!" said Papa bear, noticing his straw cushion tossed into the corner. "Someone's been sitting in mine too!" said Mama bear. "And someone's been sitting in my pseudo-chair!" said Taro-bear. "Look! It's broken!"

Mama bear and Papa bear went into the bedroom. "Someone's been sleeping in our futons!" they said. "Eeeek! A gaijin!" yelled Taro-bear from his bedroom.

The scream awoke Goldilocks, who was now looking into the surprised faces of Mama bear, Papa bear and the biggest bear of all, teenaged Taro-bear. When she saw Taro-bear, she squealed with delight, "I like your Beckham haircut!"

The three bears burst out laughing.

Goldilocks explained she was just a lost tourist and meant no harm.

The three bears, thrilled to practice their English, helped Goldilocks find her way out of the forest and back to her hotel. As they parted, the bears had tears in their eyes. "Samishii, na?" they said. "Goldirocks, please come back for another home stay next year!"



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